My Bi-National Story

by Cindy in Australia

I'm a 34 year old woman from Australia in a same sex relationship with a 35 year old woman from CA, USA. We have been together now for approximately two years and are very much committed and in love. We would love to marry as I am sure thousands of other couples would.

I travel to see my Partner at least two to three times per year, subject to my current finances. This is such a strain on both of us both emotionally and financially. We want me to be able to migrate there so we can build a life together, but I don't have a Bachelors Degree to qualify me to work, nor do I have immediate family or an employer to sponsor me to stay. I certainly don't have $1,000,000 to invest in the country.

I was just there for seven weeks vacation to investigate these possibilities of work and sponsorship, and also to be with my partner. These seven weeks exhausted both my bank account and vacation time from my current job - in which I have to work solid for 6+ months before I can save up the money and vacation hours to go back for another two to three weeks.

Leaving my partner at the airport every single time I have to come back is like a death sentence all over again. Our hearts get torn in two, our lives go back to utter loneliness and depression. We are separated by time differences - and have to plan times to call the other at appropriate hours of the day, and then are only able to spend small amounts of time on the phone due to large bills. HOW IS THIS LOVE?

To get off the plane into her arms is the most magical of feelings that is worth more than all the riches in the world. To lay beside her at night is a dream come true, so comforting, like I have finally come home to my love and where I belong. To make love to her is the most precious and sacred of moments that I treasure for all life - because who knows what will happen tomorrow. To wake in the morning from such a content sleep wrapped in her arms and the first thing I see is her: nothing could be more beautiful or warming to me.

To just be with her everyday, stealing little smiles and kisses without a care in the world. To tell her that 'I Love Her' just because my heart felt like it. To see her in joy and such content happiness, just because I'm there with her. To protect her from the sadness and all things bad in the world. To take care of her when she is down or sick.

All these simple little things that make you feel love in your heart - are stripped from my soul when the current Californian laws state that marriage is only defined as between a man and woman. What gives the Government this right to judge and decide whom I should love and give my life, commitment, heart and soul to? The Government should be more concerned with terrorism, poverty, homelessness, orphans, crime rate, unemployment, health care, welfare and issues that are far more important than telling same-sex couples, "YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO MARRY." I love my partner more than life itself and for me not to be there sharing my life with her is a crime.

All we want is the right to live a life together without heartache or separation. To be able to marry and have a mortgage we have worked hard for. I want to cry tears of joy again for arriving home to her forever, not tears of sadness and heartache for leaving her alone again because the laws say I can't stay. You have so many same-sex couples that are truly in love - look at all the hate in the world today, look at all the natural disasters killing thousands of people around the world - and yet you "WON'T" let same-sex people live a life of marriage. We are separated by countries due to your immigration laws that don't support same-sex marriage for immigration.

How can mail order brides be granted a life in the USA when they don't love their supposed partner who went across to the bride's country and picked her from a catalogue of single women - yet I am totally 100% in love and committed to my partner, fighting tooth and nail for freedom to establish a life we so honestly deserve. You have so many sham marriages - if all I wanted was a life in the USA I would marry a male I met through a bridal agency. The honest fact is that "I'M GAY," and I don't want to be with a male in order to have a life in the USA. I just want to be with my loving partner Lisa - who I miss every second of my separated life from her - to establish a life with her in my newfound country and a home where I belong. I want to be with my partner, to become a US citizen and to adopt this country as my own.

Is this such a huge thing to ask? You have heterosexual couples marrying for migration (sham or real - how many of those are legit?) but you also have so many bi-national gay and lesbian couples that are legit in their relationships. We don't want to have phony marriages, WE JUST WANT OUR OWN.

We run the risk of having our loving relationship break down due to these restrictions with the current immigration laws, as it always puts such a strain on our relationship and family. As a bi-national couple - "YES" we are very much committed and in love, but with the constant trouble of travel, finances and finding vacation time - we don't know how long we can survive this ordeal of trying to be together. I know a lot of couples have already fallen apart due to the current laws keeping them apart, my partner and I don't want to be another couple on the list of numbers that have separated and lost all hope of having a life and family together.

We miss each other, we miss our life, all we want, is to be wife and wife.

**Visit Immigration Equality and Love Sees No Borders for information on how you can get involved in the fight to end discrimination against gays and lesbians in US immigration law.**